#church lady

[unfortunatelyprofounddaughter]

church lady magic✨

[talesfrommedinastation]

Here have a quick flat paint scribble of an AU where Church Lady Phee is a smart mouthed anthropology professor that randomly goes over to sass/hit on/steal ‘treasures’ from the College of Engineering where Ryan-from-Accounting Tech is working.

Yes she would be an AKA, she has that energy, according to people in the know, ir Redneck Doug (“You know her bathroom is covered in green and pink, trust me.”). She also is a Saints fan, a proud Crescent City resident, and I will die on that hill. WHO DAT.

[boybasher]

[iheardyoulooking]

[briskettimefestival]

[thesiouxzy]

[bojackson54]

Ambassadors or Judges: Which Role Should Christians Play?

Governments appoint ambassadors to talk to other nations on their behalf. They represent our interests and concerns on the world stage, and even though most of them are appointed based on political favors, I hope at least some of them are given their posts based on competency. After all, they may need to help avert a serious schism between nations, or even a war now and then. We would hope that…

[lbeth1950]

Little Kid Logic

Bud’s four-year-old nephew was a cute kid with a mouth! We were fortunate enough to be on hand when he initiated a conversation with his aunt, a proper church lady. She jokingly referred to her husband Mack as Macky Wacky Packy Sacky. Young Andrew had clearly been warned about his language prior to the visit. The warning was clearly heavy on his mind. He rebuked her. “ Don’t say that. Macky…

[catholike]

[legacyteez]

Church Ladies Rule!!

[incaseyouneedhelpremembering]

Ninth

I’d like to speak on another short story from The Secret Lives of Church Ladies. This one being “Eula.” I found this story incredibly frustrating. It details the struggle of a queer woman and her love affair with a closeted woman of faith. For literal decades, they had been having a sexual relationship, however, Eula refuses to view what they have as genuine. This would not have bothered me so much if one of two things occurred. One, Caroletta realized that Eula would never really accept her or what they had, and she moved on. Two, Eula opened her mind at least a little. Neither occurred. I was left with the distinct impression that they were both going to die and never figure it out. It was very disappointing to read as it left me with no closure. I felt as though I had read a story with no ending because for all intents and purposes I did. There was no light at the end of the tunnel. The damage done to Eula was permanent. She could never see what was right in front of her no matter how much time passed and no matter how badly Caroletta wanted to make things work. Though unsatisfying, I shudder to think just how many women in real life have gone or are currently going through something similar and they have no resolution to speak of either. 

[algorithmik]

Church Lady aesthetic

[boybasher]

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•

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my poem:

She hangs around church

Yet never steps in

Where’s she’s not welcome

You’re only invited to the party

If you’re offering burdens

Give them what they want

Mental and soul capacity

Like a little lamb in captivity

Rooms full of robed men with rotten beliefs like

“Women are made for us”

In worship, pleasure and lust

With her hair too high

Her eyes too bright

Her dress too tight

“Men over women”

Is what she was taught

What’s to do when he’s the one wearing the shimmering lipstick?

Stone him and veto his get out of jail free card?

She’s lingers around church

Yet never steps in

Where’s she’s not embraced

You’re only welcomed to the congregation

If you’re offering obedience

Save your spot in heaven

Before it’s too late

Judgment day is promised

Be careful what you say

Be aware of who you kiss

Double check your closet of bones

The devils always near

And the man in the sky is watching intently

Remember who you are

But don’t cause them to think

Keep yourself normal

Keep yourself sane

Keep yourself tucked away

Three million dollar building

You can only speak to capital H

With a few sacrificing hundreds tucked in your pockets

So she waits by the wooden doors

Peeks in through the stained glasses

[abhorsenkatiel]

My opinion on the 'would modern au Harrow be goth or Catholic' debate is that she would be both and it would throw everyone off. She goes equally hard on both of those things and no one knows what to do about it.

[its-all-down-hill]

[bluebell-lace]

🦢 our lady of sorrows 🕯